https://www.straitstimes.com/opinion/forum/forum-don-t-have-children-just-for-them-to-look-after-you
It is indeed stressful for seniors who have to take care of their parents (As seniors become caregivers to seniors, can doctors lighten their load?, Sept 5).
Children are not insurance, or future servants, or anything else but people in their own right, with their own needs and wishes that are quite independent of others' needs or wishes.
If you want children for selfish reasons, including wanting them to provide all the amenities of a retirement home for you later, then the last thing you should do is have children. Old age infirmaries are best left to the professionals, and not children who may be under-financed and under-skilled.
There is also no guarantee that having children means they'll take care of you when you are old. Visit any old folks' home and ask the residents and the staff how many residents never see their family.
If you want children, enjoy watching and helping them grow from helpless babies into fully competent adults, independent of you in every way.
And if you make your children's childhood happy, they might actively want to go on seeing you once they've left home and look after you in your old age. If not, and if you persist in considering them and their needs and wants only as they relate to you, then it will be nothing but duty that makes them visit you (if they do) once they are adults. And you may see resentment seething in them.
Hopefully, people without children are saving up and have retirement and health insurance plans in place that will see them through their old age.
Jonathan Wong Teck Fatt
ya correct. really
Sadly, most parents dun think this way
That y tell u all pcc can liao
Most boomers disagree :frown:
Quote from: Banned User on Sep 12, 2024, 11:34 AMMost boomers disagree :frown:
There is probably one issue
Boomers will say but we can do it why can't you?
But boomers have a lot of siblings to help out. The boomers may not have many children. The children of boomers now have very few if any siblings to help out. Expectations remain the same but the pressures increase
The writer..he never think parents tc of him when he is bab
Quote from: Nevereatrice on Sep 12, 2024, 12:24 PMThe writer..he never think parents tc of him when he is bab
I think a lot of times it's really family specific situation. So I think he has a point. Whether it relates to him or not is a separate issue.
It's easy to take the moral high ground by claiming filial piety. It's easier for elders to point out the need to be filial than to point out to parents not to view children as retirement plans.
Quote from: Philipkee on Sep 12, 2024, 12:53 PMI think a lot of times it's really family specific situation. So I think he has a point. Whether it relates to him or not is a separate issue.
It's easy to take the moral high ground by claiming filial piety. It's easier for elders to point out the need to be filial than to point out to parents not to view children as retirement plans.
Quote from: Philipkee on Sep 12, 2024, 12:53 PMI think a lot of times it's really family specific situation. So I think he has a point. Whether it relates to him or not is a separate issue.
It's easy to take the moral high ground by claiming filial piety. It's easier for elders to point out the need to be filial than to point out to parents not to view children as retirement plans.
Can go other way also grow up liao find that life is difficult earn money but bec of gfs bec of personal greed now burn bridge deem parents as redundant
I have heard alot of stories son buys bags/treats meals to chase girl but to own parents say don't expect me to take care of u
But we don't know which situation is the writer in
Money most impt
Quote from: Nevereatrice on Sep 12, 2024, 01:14 PMCan go other way also grow up liao find that life is difficult earn money but bec of gfs bec of personal greed now burn bridge deem parents as redundant
I have heard alot of stories son buys bags/treats meals to chase girl but to own parents say don't expect me to take care of u
But we don't know which situation is the writer in
Even in edmw I see amny ppl ownself buy latest iphone for themself but buy budget $200 android phones for parents. Reason being parents not tech savvy, duno how to appreciate high end phones etc bs
I ever managed to convince a couple to have another child (they alkready have a dotter at that time) cos I say only child is lonely and next time very tough on her to support both of you be it physically or financially. They really took my advice hahahaha
I actually just wanted more youngster to support me in my retirement age. I see current boomers enjoying all the perks of pioneer, merdeka and subsidised this and that sibei song. That said, I'm supporting those youngsters now also....so it's fair
Quote from: peaceheart on Sep 12, 2024, 03:12 PMI ever managed to convince a couple to have another child (they alkready have a dotter at that time) cos I say only child is lonely and next time very tough on her to support both of you be it physically or financially. They really took my advice hahahaha
I actually just wanted more youngster to support me in my retirement age. I see current boomers enjoying all the perks of pioneer, merdeka and subsidised this and that sibei song. That said, I'm supporting those youngsters now also....so it's fair
U think so much ah?
For me i look at the current direction of sg is gg i feel.
U see the prices of everything are soaring.
Unless u are a high flyer or minimum dual income of 12k then maybe u can have most perks.
Live in 4 to 5 room and have the required for 1 to 2 kids and they have that chance to compete with others their age.
Bearing in mind they must be at least be on par in terms of smarts, looks, height with their peers and shun shun all the way.
And u must shun shun all the way also. No sickness no bad things.
Then u see ai, robotics going full steam.
And our govt doesnt care abt the people and they also not much way to improve due to land scarcity.
We are at the peak now or have plateaued. The only way is down from here
Quote from: default on Sep 12, 2024, 03:19 PMU think so much ah?
For me i look at the current direction of sg is gg i feel.
U see the prices of everything are soaring.
Unless u are a high flyer or minimum dual income of 12k then maybe u can have most perks.
Live in 4 to 5 room and have the required for 1 to 2 kids and they have that chance to compete with others their age.
Bearing in mind they must be at least be on par in terms of smarts, looks, height with their peers and shun shun all the way.
And u must shun shun all the way also. No sickness no bad things.
Then u see ai, robotics going full steam.
And our govt doesnt care abt the people and they also not much way to improve due to land scarcity.
We are at the peak now or have plateaued. The only way is down from here
I think you misunderstood my post
Precisely I'm no high flyer that's why I should be entitled to all the senior citizen perks in future which will be the burden on the children today. Only when we have more working adults than non working retirees than can we have all the senior citizen perks.
Quote from: peaceheart on Sep 12, 2024, 03:26 PMI think you misunderstood my post
Precisely I'm no high flyer that's why I should be entitled to all the senior citizen perks in future which will be the burden on the children today. Only when we have more working adults than non working retirees than can we have all the senior citizen perks.
i think AI or what will kill many jobs and these kids and even during our time next 10-30 yrs we will be in deep shit but worse during their time
maybe dont even have jobs for working adults thats what im saying... meaning to say how are these children going to survive?
unless they introduce universal basic income
u see it took just 3-4 yrs for AI to come today's advancements. plus they say already trained all data and info from since mankind started recording information till now liao
i cant stop talking about AI i see really is wlwlsmdwl
Quote from: default on Sep 12, 2024, 04:05 PMi think AI or what will kill many jobs and these kids and even during our time next 10-30 yrs we will be in deep shit but worse during their time
maybe dont even have jobs for working adults
unless they introduce universal basic income
I duno how the future is going to be like but generally should have more working adults than retirees to keep the system going
So yah, pls keep having children for my own selfish agenda!
Quote from: Nevereatrice on Sep 12, 2024, 01:14 PMCan go other way also grow up liao find that life is difficult earn money but bec of gfs bec of personal greed now burn bridge deem parents as redundant
I have heard alot of stories son buys bags/treats meals to chase girl but to own parents say don't expect me to take care of u
But we don't know which situation is the writer in
This, I heard before and experienced. Dated a singapore girl once. Expectations is must go restaurant each time cos according to parents, that's how a man is to treat a lady
So sometimes maybe the guy has to choose. Chase the girl or support the parent but not both. Then how? Especially if Singapore girls demand sky and sea?
Stay single? Own parents/relatives suan
Marry sinkie? Cannot do both. Either will be unfilial or ungentlemanly
Marry foreigner like Vietbu? Labelled as loser.
Quote from: Philipkee on Sep 12, 2024, 04:46 PMThis, I heard before and experienced. Dated a singapore girl once. Expectations is must go restaurant each time cos according to parents, that's how a man is to treat a lady
So sometimes maybe the guy has to choose. Chase the girl or support the parent but not both. Then how? Especially if Singapore girls demand sky and sea?
Stay single? Own parents/relatives suan
Marry sinkie? Cannot do both. Either will be unfilial or ungentlemanly
Marry foreigner like Vietbu? Labelled as loser.
Do what is best for you, what makes you happy. Dun live for others.
But not saying totally heck care others also. Eg for parents, can spend $ and make time for them, can sacrifice a bit for them
Quote from: Philipkee on Sep 12, 2024, 04:46 PMThis, I heard before and experienced. Dated a singapore girl once. Expectations is must go restaurant each time cos according to parents, that's how a man is to treat a lady
So sometimes maybe the guy has to choose. Chase the girl or support the parent but not both. Then how? Especially if Singapore girls demand sky and sea?
Stay single? Own parents/relatives suan
Marry sinkie? Cannot do both. Either will be unfilial or ungentlemanly
Marry foreigner like Vietbu? Labelled as loser.
I spoke to a boomer before she is understanding about this. She told me her kids also need to spend money to chase girls so won't expect their kids to spend money on them
Quote from: Philipkee on Sep 12, 2024, 04:46 PMThis, I heard before and experienced. Dated a singapore girl once. Expectations is must go restaurant each time cos according to parents, that's how a man is to treat a lady
So sometimes maybe the guy has to choose. Chase the girl or support the parent but not both. Then how? Especially if Singapore girls demand sky and sea?
Stay single? Own parents/relatives suan
Marry sinkie? Cannot do both. Either will be unfilial or ungentlemanly
Marry foreigner like Vietbu? Labelled as loser.
merry atb.. atbdcpjhj!!
:flash: :flash:
Quote from: jim889 on Sep 12, 2024, 06:54 PMmerry atb.. atbdcpjhj!!
:flash: :flash:
Skkdqbjhj. That's what they will shout
SinKie Kia de qian Bao jin ho Jiak
Quote from: Philipkee on Sep 12, 2024, 06:57 PMSkkdqbjhj. That's what they will shout
SinKie Kia de qian Bao jin ho Jiak
they let chiu eat cheese pies, chiu gib them qian ish 天经地义 的。
:frown:
Quote from: Philipkee on Sep 12, 2024, 06:57 PMSkkdqbjhj. That's what they will shout
SinKie Kia de qian Bao jin ho Jiak
Their own ppl they don cheat come n cheat us . Why ? We so toopiad meh?
Quote from: Philipkee on Sep 12, 2024, 04:46 PMThis, I heard before and experienced. Dated a singapore girl once. Expectations is must go restaurant each time cos according to parents, that's how a man is to treat a lady
So sometimes maybe the guy has to choose. Chase the girl or support the parent but not both. Then how? Especially if Singapore girls demand sky and sea?
Stay single? Own parents/relatives suan
Marry sinkie? Cannot do both. Either will be unfilial or ungentlemanly
Marry foreigner like Vietbu? Labelled as loser.
We no from golden spoon family nor we retired with 9999 or more passive income lei
How to every meal restaurant as a common human on street
Quote from: EncourageSome1 on Sep 14, 2024, 11:13 AMTheir own ppl they don cheat come n cheat us . Why ? We so toopiad meh?
Eh sinkies not known to be smart
Dun mistake well educated for smart
Quote from: Nevereatrice on Sep 12, 2024, 05:33 PMI spoke to a boomer before she is understanding about this. She told me her kids also need to spend money to chase girls so won't expect their kids to spend money on them
my folks don hv expectations like u hv to bring me go this there or eat this n that
They expect care time respect and sustenance .. I eat what they eat what
N they don't hv a plan
I am the plan of their retirement 🤗
Quote from: EncourageSome1 on Sep 14, 2024, 11:17 AMmy folks don hv expectations like u hv to bring me go this there or eat this n that
They expect care time respect and sustenance .. I eat what they eat what
N they don't hv a plan
I am the plan of their retirement 🤗
Cpf fat fat
Quote from: Nevereatrice on Sep 14, 2024, 11:34 AMCpf fat fat
Mommy nv work much work that paid Cpf
My pa flip HSE twice so Cpf used up
Quote from: EncourageSome1 on Sep 14, 2024, 12:18 PMMommy nv work much work that paid Cpf
My pa flip HSE twice so Cpf used up
Cpf needs to be top up after selling house how can use up
Must be he smoke u don't let u know
Quote from: Nevereatrice on Sep 14, 2024, 12:23 PMCpf needs to be top up after selling house how can use up
Must be he smoke u don't let u know
He illiterate one nah
All papers I read for him de
His England only market english
His cpf 3-5 k we ask them put there la tk for what ? He got no use other than spend on 🐎 gambling .. might as well can see can't Tk Better
Quote from: EncourageSome1 on Sep 14, 2024, 01:15 PMHe illiterate one nah
All papers I read for him de
His England only market english
His cpf 3-5 k we ask them put there la tk for what ? He got no use other than spend on 🐎 gambling .. might as well can see can't Tk Better
Can dl Google translate for him use camera scan can translate real time
Quote from: EncourageSome1 on Sep 14, 2024, 12:18 PMMommy nv work much work that paid Cpf
My pa flip HSE twice so Cpf used up
Flip hse twice means make many money leh
Quote from: Nevereatrice on Sep 14, 2024, 01:33 PMCan dl Google translate for him use camera scan can translate real time
He type one word
Yes
Takes 1 min
Quote from: default on Sep 14, 2024, 01:35 PMFlip hse twice means make many money leh
He say God nv make him huat
He flip ea time owe more money to accumulate more acc interest 🫣😅😆
Heng Heng we his kids nv hv more debt than him
Quote from: default on Sep 14, 2024, 01:35 PMFlip hse twice means make many money leh
Flip is hv all kinds of situation de
For ppl who flip correct time : they just
Flip at wrong time get into more debt