My father at nursing home. Visit liao feel sad. Dont visit feel guilty
Very far is it?
Quote from: peaceheart on Sep 08, 2024, 05:11 PMVery far is it?
Its quite near but need to take bus and walk abt 5min la.
But when i visit i always have to bring drinks and snacks. Sometimes also a meal or hot coffee
Then have to take grab.
I think coz im damn sian of my life going nowhr thats why
Quote from: default on Sep 08, 2024, 05:18 PMIts quite near but need to take bus and walk abt 5min la.
But when i visit i always have to bring drinks and snacks. Sometimes also a meal or hot coffee
Then have to take grab.
I think coz im damn sian of my life going nowhr thats why
How's chiur relationship with chiur dad? If gd then should visit more. If no gd then visit less frequently :frown:
Quote from: Banned User on Sep 08, 2024, 05:34 PMHow's chiur relationship with chiur dad? If gd then should visit more. If no gd then visit less frequently :frown:
Hmm hes considered a good father bah.
Last time always quarrel with him when im younger la
Quote from: default on Sep 08, 2024, 05:50 PMHmm hes considered a good father bah.
Last time always quarrel with him when im younger la
see gotch chan can bring him home or not lor
:frown:
Quote from: jim889 on Sep 08, 2024, 06:12 PMsee gotch chan can bring him home or not lor
:frown:
Not easy to be the sole caregiver for parent with dementia :frown:
Quote from: Banned User on Sep 08, 2024, 06:47 PMNot easy to be the sole caregiver for parent with dementia :frown:
tee bee said gotch the something link can appry? gotch 80% suckseelee ?
:frown:
Quote from: jim889 on Sep 08, 2024, 06:12 PMsee gotch chan can bring him home or not lor
:frown:
very hard honestly... house v small and i also no money and even if hire caregiver also really not easy to manage
thats why i so pek cek everything is falling apart
bring him back a few days every few mths i try to do that
Quote from: default on Sep 08, 2024, 07:24 PMvery hard honestly... house v small and i also no money and even if hire caregiver also really not easy to manage
thats why i so pek cek everything is falling apart
bring him back a few days every few mths i try to do that
yeah bring him back every now and then ish best solution lor
:frown:
Quote from: jim889 on Sep 08, 2024, 07:30 PMyeah bring him back every now and then ish best solution lor
:frown:
ya got my own personal and work issues to deal with. very sick of life honestly
Quote from: default on Sep 08, 2024, 05:50 PMHmm hes considered a good father bah.
Last time always quarrel with him when im younger la
I always quarrel with my father when I'm younger too. Guess that's a normal phase og life
Quote from: default on Sep 08, 2024, 05:02 PMMy father at nursing home. Visit liao feel sad. Dont visit feel guilty
My question / motivator to U is
If U know this is yr last few days with yr pa .. and Ur last chance u missed it cos U were lazy..
Should choose what U d not regret if tmr is last day of earth ...
If go.. treat as an excursion for u n him.. set this time apart for him just 1.5-2 h a week or week ish ...
If Ur mindset changes it wouldn't feel so hard
If U don't.. then it s just another chore to be checked off 😭
Quote from: default on Sep 08, 2024, 05:02 PMMy father at nursing home. Visit liao feel sad. Dont visit feel guilty
visit lah, its sad indeed cos we will feel so helpless and useless at times when we see him
but still is our one and only papa mah
Quote from: daryl76 on Sep 08, 2024, 08:30 PMvisit lah, its sad indeed cos we will feel so helpless and useless at times when we see him
but still is our one and only papa mah
last time u good w ur father boh, as in younger time before u got children
Quote from: default on Sep 08, 2024, 08:03 PMya got my own personal and work issues to deal with. very sick of life honestly
just take it easy rah
find new jod if not heypi with jod
:frown:
how long more to live? cherish wor.. if not lorry already how?
Quote from: default on Sep 08, 2024, 09:06 PMlast time u good w ur father boh, as in younger time before u got children
not really, hahahahaha we were never close
cos my parents very old school type, dad go earn money and mom takes care of the family
Quote from: daryl76 on Sep 09, 2024, 04:54 AMnot really, hahahahaha we were never close
cos my parents very old school type, dad go earn money and mom takes care of the family
Same.In moi case Mom tank all the parenting duties. No comments on Dad. 冷到不能在冷了 :frown:
Quote from: Banned User on Sep 09, 2024, 08:34 AMSame.In moi case Mom tank all the parenting duties. No comments on Dad. 冷到不能在冷了 :frown:
very old school traditional type of parenting i guess
like i always tell ny kids, dun make the same mistake... its ok to make them, its not if we repeat them
so now me and wife both have a fair share of responsibility
Quote from: daryl76 on Sep 09, 2024, 04:54 AMnot really, hahahahaha we were never close
cos my parents very old school type, dad go earn money and mom takes care of the family
same same la but u got siblings. maybe some siblings close to father some to mum
Quote from: Banned User on Sep 09, 2024, 08:34 AMSame.In moi case Mom tank all the parenting duties. No comments on Dad. 冷到不能在冷了 :frown:
how 冷?
my father usually always go out hang out with clan association and friends last time (usually to play mahjong or go jiak ho liao)....... got stay home after work la. then he usually works half days on saturday. his time no leave one i very peifu him.
last time i a bit look down on him since he doesnt make much money and not educated... really is after NS then mindset grow up more. coz when young we compare to other fathers mah, why this father got car or got van, this father knows how to talk to the son, this father knows how to play with the son
coz the boss makan their leave. only when they got serious issues like sick, or wan to go overseas then must apply
when im younger (pri sch all up to younger sec sch) he got bring me out on sundays and always got buy small snacks home, or durians la. after that grow old liao, rebellious period not close to mum and dad
the only thing is he nv study very high so cant communicate much except talk in teochew. even so, his teochew quite limited
thats why hes still a good father la, B- or B maybe
i think good enough liao lor. i was quite fucked up son. honestly i would give myself a C. when I became older then it's more like a C or C+........ not trying to be humble but i rly damn fucked up lol
i think if i ever become a father i also wont get B or higher. best probably C+ or B-
even now when i visit him he see me unhappy he will say why i look sad, he will stand up for me. thats why no matter what he's a good father.
but he also is always all talk no action dont dare to stand up for himself because he is not good at talking. but everyone loves him coz he polite and 爽快 kind of person... neighbours and people in the neighbourhood all know him and will greet him coz he always greets them
Quote from: default on Sep 09, 2024, 01:12 PMhow 冷?
my father usually always go out hang out with clan association and friends last time (usually to play mahjong or go jiak ho liao)....... got stay home after work la. then he usually works half days on saturday. his time no leave one i very peifu him.
last time i a bit look down on him since he doesnt make much money and not educated... really is after NS then mindset grow up more. coz when young we compare to other fathers mah, why this father got car or got van, this father knows how to talk to the son, this father knows how to play with the son
coz the boss makan their leave. only when they got serious issues like sick, or wan to go overseas then must apply
when im younger (pri sch all up to younger sec sch) he got bring me out on sundays and always got buy small snacks home, or durians la. after that grow old liao, rebellious period not close to mum and dad
the only thing is he nv study very high so cant communicate much except talk in teochew. even so, his teochew quite limited
thats why hes still a good father la, B- or B maybe
i think good enough liao lor. i was quite fucked up son. honestly i would give myself a C. when I became older then it's more like a C or C+........ not trying to be humble but i rly damn fucked up lol
i think if i ever become a father i also wont get B or higher. best probably C+ or B-
even now when i visit him he see me unhappy he will say why i look sad, he will stand up for me. thats why no matter what he's a good father.
but he also is always all talk no action dont dare to stand up for himself because he is not good at talking. but everyone loves him coz he polite and 爽快 kind of person... neighbours and people in the neighbourhood all know him and will greet him coz he always greets them
冷 as in there is hardly any communication between my Dad and I. He keep quiet, i also keep quiet and we myob. Not the 冷战 kind of 冷。 Hard to relate to my Dad as there is hardly any father son bonding. Afterall he was the sole breadwinner. I also had rebel against my dad when i was younger.
in the end everytime is i stand up for him and my mum against authorities (no la as in no trouble w them but any communications will go thru me)
then if quarrel with relatives or neighbours end up is me standing up for myself and them
so ya B- for him lor
but C or C- for me as a son
Quote from: default on Sep 09, 2024, 02:29 PMin the end everytime is i stand up for him and my mum against authorities (no la as in no trouble w them but any communications will go thru me)
then if quarrel with relatives or neighbours end up is me standing up for myself and them
so ya B- for him lor
but C or C- for me as a son
i'd also grade myself 'C' (Charsiew)
Dad didn't stand up for me, and neither do I.
Quote from: default on Sep 09, 2024, 01:09 PMsame same la but u got siblings. maybe some siblings close to father some to mum
yeah in a way
my dad always closer to my sis
though i spent the most time with him towards the end
Life is so unpredictable. Before you know it, even if you want to see him, you will not be able too. Not much time left for you & him to spend time together. Treasure the limited time now.